What Train Are You On?
Do you ever think:
• “I need to find my true purpose.”
• “I picked the wrong life.”
• “I’ll feel happy when I find my right career, relationship or place to live.”
You are not alone.
This often comes up during the first few coaching sessions with a new client. At some point, people often imagined there is the one perfect purpose or design for their life – if only they could discover it.
Having a vision, dreams, purpose and meaning in life is crucial for happiness. However, I find that initially many of my clients get stuck thinking there’s only one “perfect” career, path, relationship or place to live.
When you think there’s only one, you miss enjoying the ride and who you’re taking it with.
There’s an interesting story in the book Being, called Waiting at The Train Station, by Bennett Wong, one of my mentors. In his story, he posits that life is like a train station, with different trains (purposes) coming in and out of the station.
We often stand on the platform looking for our “one perfect” train. We’re so afraid of getting on the “wrong” train, worried about heading to the wrong destination that we get stuck standing on the platform watching the trains come in and out of the station.
Life goes by as we stand and watch feeling discontented.
Life is about movement.
The key to aliveness and fulfillment is not watching, analyzing and trying to pick the perfect train, but rather, getting on a train, any train, and seeing how you like the ride. Looking out the window and noticing if you like the scenery. Meeting and chatting with the other people on the train and seeing if you like, respect and want to be like them.
The train always pulls into another station. You can get off that train and get on another one.
Bennett and I happen to agree with the concept that the key to life is not waiting for certainty, for the perfect or right train, but committing to and getting on a train and seeing how you enjoy the ride. I love this analogy. I have found it incredibly helpful in my life and in working with clients.
CrisMarie and I both enjoy working with you, our clients, to help you find and access your mojo, your muchness, so that you can move forward in your life with passion and purpose.
One of our tenets is take a leap!
Ask yourself, “Am I trying to find the right or perfect train (purpose, relationship or career)? Am I spending a lot of my time waiting, analyzing and feeling discontented?”
If the answer is yes, then we want to encourage you to take a leap and get on a train.
Choose. Move. Engage.
Are you wondering how to choose your next train?
• Notice the people around you that you respect, admire or envy. What train are they on?
• Try several trains and see how each ride feels to you.
• Pay close attention to the people on the train. How you feel about them?
You learn through trial and error, not by analysis. You learn by doing and seeing if something fits for you.
Take that first step. Once you’re on the train, or the journey, don't just focus on getting to the destination, enjoy the ride. Look out the window and enjoy the view. Meet and get to know the people.
Remember, nothing is forever. You can always get off at the next station and get on another train. You can make a different choice if it doesn’t work out. Really.
You cannot do this wrong. You’re always learning from every experience you have. Every time you notice what you don’t like, you get clearer about what you do like.
BTW, all trains eventually pull into the same station—the end of your life. You want to make sure you revel in your journey and not suffer at the station, watching trains go by.
We hope you enjoy the many trains you take and recognize it’s not the accomplishments you’ll likely value when you come into that final station. What will matter most are the people you’ve shared the ride with and the connections you’ve made along the way.
P.S. Do you want some support stepping off the platform and getting on a train? Why not join us for Get Unstuck, Relationship Mojo, or our signature retreat Find Your Mojo in Montana. Want more one-on-one help? I’m also available for personal coaching.
CrisMarie Campbell and Susan Clarke are Master certified life coaches, business consultants, speakers and authors of The Beauty of Conflict. They believe real relationships are the key to creating great business results. They’ll take your team from mediocre to great.
Interested in coaching? Check out CrisMarie’s executive coaching and personal coaching, or Susan’s personal coaching and equus coaching.
Want to take a class? Sign up for one of their virtual classes: Get Unstuck, Relationship Mojo or come to their signature retreat Find Your Mojo in Montana. Click here to check out all their service offerings.
Click here to contact them to coach with you, consult with your team, or speak at your next event.