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Opting Out of Conflict

Opting out of conflict is the easiest way out, but it undermines a team's performance.

In this episode of the Beauty of Conflict, Susan and CrisMarie break down three common opt-out styles for people to draw upon when tension builds up toward conflict. They also offer more fruitful alternatives instead of going MIA. An Accommodator will seek to please the people involved as they fear disapproval, anger, or aggressive behavior. A person who takes the Superstar path will try to be the hero by solving the problem and feel action is being taken in favor of a solution, but often ignoring others’ input. The third and last one is hard to identify, as the Separator’s way to opt out is to keep themselves uber-focused on the work, disregarding interpersonal relationships or feelings dynamics.

Listen to this episode and learn how to recognize your own opt-out styles and get more power and influence by stepping out of those familiar roads!

If you’d like us to speak at your organization about conflict, stress, team-building, or leadership, work with your team virtually, or coach you or leaders on your team, reach out to us!

If you enjoyed the show, please share the podcast with your family and friends, or post a five-star review on iTunes. Rating and reviewing the show helps spread the word, which means less friction and suffering for everyone, and who doesn’t want that?

Key Take-Aways

  • What are the three common opt-out styles called, and their characteristics.

  • How opting out can seem a good option but there are better options in the long run.

  • How to engage with a person whose opt-out style is the Superstar.

  • Why more than an only-rational approach to an issue is needed to thoroughly address it.

  • Where do opt-out styles come from.


  • Listen to more episodes of The Beauty of Conflict podcast here.

  • Find more details about Find Your Mojo in Montana here.

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  • If there’s something you want us to talk about related to the beauty of conflict for teams, let us know at!

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  • Connect and follow CrisMarie on LinkedIn.

  • Listen to past episodes of the Podcast on Apple Podcasts.


CrisMarie Campbell and Susan Clarke

Coaches, Business Consultants, Speakers and Authors of The Beauty of Conflict

CrisMarie and Susan work with leaders and teams, couples in business, and professional women.

They help dysfunctional turnaround teams into high-performing, cohesive teams who trust each other, deal with differences directly, and have clarity and alignment on their business strategy, so they create great results.

Download the eBook, How to Talk About Difficult Topics, today!

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