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That Thang You Hate About Yourself

What’s that thang you hate or don’t like about yourself?

Maybe you’re embarrassed about it.

You work hard to try to hide, change, downplay or hope no one notices it.

Big mistake.

What you may not realize that thang actually makes you special, unique and could become your superpower.

Don’t believe me? Take Dana Falsetti.

Dana Falsetti is a body-positive yoga teacher. I had the privilege of attending one of her yoga workshops right here in Whitefish, Montana this weekend, hosted by my long-time friend and yoga master Jodi Petlin who runs Shanti Yoga.

What’s unique about Dana?

Well, she not your typical tight, tiny yoga body type. Nope. She’s a big woman. She’s always been large. Once she worked to lose 100 lbs, but when she did, she felt exactly the same, even in a smaller body. She decided to stop trying to change to fit-in and instead embraced her natural size and shares her authentic voice through practicing and teaching yoga.

When Dana tried to “get rid” of her problem weight, it did nothing for her. Her magic began when she embraced her size, and even made more of it. Now she’s a role model for millions of women who previously believed they’re too big to do yoga.

Doubt her super power? Check her out on Facebook and you’ll see her success.

For me, growing up was hard because I was too sensitive and overly emotional for my Army Colonel Dad. I learned early on sharing my feelings with Dad wasn’t going to end well.

Plus, I was the white kid or the “haole” in my all Hawaiian school. I’d come home crying and run to my mom to ask, “Why are my feet so white?”

I was seven.

I was lonely and had no friends.

I wanted to be darker skinned.

I put coconut oil on to tan.

I only burned.

So, what happened?

Eventually, I learned to toughened right up.

I stuffed my sensitive, emotional side.

I drove right over how I felt and what I wanted.

I became a super-achiever: Olympics, Boeing Flight Test Engineer, MBA ya’da ya’da.

Yes, I fit-in on the outside, but was an emotional mess on the inside. All that energy I was using to stuff down how I really felt and wanted was causing havoc inside of me.

I was 34.

I had a chronic back injury.

I was in a co-dependent relationship.

My career was stalled.

Then, I realized I couldn’t keep pretending I was this person I wasn’t. Like it or not:

  • I am sensitive.

  • I am emotional.

  • And yes, I am white, like pale white.

I wasn’t going to change.

When I accepted my sensitive, emotionally expressive side, I became a painter, a dancer and an actress. I started my own company. I finally after 20 years of people telling me I was a natural coach, started my coaching business.

My sensitivity and emotional expression are my superpowers and are put to good use when I coach. I’m able to help you identify and embrace those parts of yourself you think are too “unacceptable,” and turn them into your unique signature strengths.

You start to recognize the energy you’re using against yourself – diminishes your power, creates stress, discomfort, wrinkles and all sorts of addictive behavior.

I help you unleash all that energy you’ve been using to hide, cover-up, change that thang to fit in. Then the momentum of your relationships, health and career starts to change for the better.

Your body starts to get healthy and thinner.

Your relationships get more honest, real and fulfilling.

You start doing the work you truly love and making money at it.

Sure, people are going to judge you.

News flash: they already are judging you.

It’s human nature to judge. If you try to change you to make them happy but you make yourself miserable…that’s pretty screwed up! Isn’t it?

So that thang you hate about yourself? It just may be the path to your greatness.

I agree with Oscar Wilde, “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.”



P.S. If you’re challenged by the communication in your primary relationship, check out Ignite Your Relationship Mojo . It’s a six-week coaching program designed to help you feel empowered, alive, and passionate in your relationship.

CrisMarie Campbell and Susan Clarke are Master certified life coaches, business consultants, speakers and authors of The Beauty of Conflict. They believe real relationships are the key to creating great business results. They’ll take your team from mediocre to great.

Interested in coaching? Check out CrisMarie’s executive coaching and personal coaching, or Susan’s personal coaching and equus coaching.

Want to take a class? Sign up for one of their virtual classes: Get Unstuck, Relationship Mojo or come to their signature retreat Find Your Mojo in Montana. Click here to check out all their service offerings.

Click here to contact them to coach with you, consult with your team, or speak at your next event.

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