The Cancer Separation Syndrome

 

There is so much about cancer that overwhelms and separates you from the world around you. It can be a frightening, isolating experience on so many levels.

 

I know this not just from coaching people facing cancer over the years, but from my own journey through four cancers.

 

Often, that’s the word people use to describe facing cancer: a “fight.” The message is to stay strong, be positive, and never give up. You’re battling cancer, and all the while, your body is being attacked with chemicals, radiation, surgical procedures, medications to reduce pain or help quiet the storm. Family and friends just want you to be okay and are often fearful of talking about the reality of the situation.

 

You may be fearful, too! And you may not want to “be strong” or “stay positive” every day. Indeed, you may be terrified, angry, or tired of the fight.

 

Even after your cancer has gone into remission, the fight doesn’t end there. You may still be left wondering “will it come back?” or “why did I survive and someone else didn’t?”

 

The fight, the trauma, the pain—all of this leads to a separation from yourself and from others.

 

While you once felt fairly comfortable in your body, now your body is an unfamiliar landscape of scars, punctures, battle wounds. You might avoid looking at your body in the mirror, avoid wearing a swimsuit, or avoid being touched.

 

While you once enjoyed close-knit friendships, perhaps now you feel like an outsider. You feel separate from your friends because you’ve experienced something they haven’t. Despite their best intentions, they don’t “get” what you’ve gone through.

 

While you once felt connected to God, now you wonder, “how could God do this to me?” and your faith might be shaken.

 

You may also feel a sense of separation between you and your own emotions. When challenging emotions arise (fear, anxiety, overwhelm) perhaps you stuff them down, slap on a smile, and try to “put on a brave face” for your family. You don’t want them to worry and suffer any more than they already have.

 

I call this the “cancer separation syndrome.” It’s a feeling of being splintered into pieces—disconnected, detached, separate rather than whole.

 

You can rebuild that sense of connection, wholeness, and trust again.  

You can rediscover the wisdom of your body.

You can and tap into your full emotional landscape whatever your diagnosis may be.

 

Every person’s path back to wholeness is unique. Personally, one of the most transformational experiences of my life has been working with animals—specifically, with horses.

 

With Equus coaching, also called horse-assisted or equine-assisted coaching, you work with horses to release trauma and come home to yourself. Equus coaching has changed my life—and it’s one of my favorite experiences to share with my clients.

 

In addition, you’ll have the shared wisdom and resonance of other women who have been on a similar journey back to wholeness.

 

You can trust your body again!

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Join me for:  When The Body Fails You: Rebuilding Trust During or After Cancer at Apache Springs, please email me here or click the button to register.